Romans 5: 3-5 in the Message reads “There’s more to come: We continue to shout our praise even when we’re hemmed in with troubles, because we know how troubles can develop passionate patience in us, and how that patience in turn forges the tempered steel of virtue, keeping us alert for whatever God will do next. In alert expectancy such as this, we’re never left feeling shortchanged. Quite the contrary—we can’t round up enough containers to hold everything God generously pours into our lives through the Holy Spirit!”
I just came home from a prayer meeting and I am still overwhelmed at the goodness of God.
As I prayed tonight, thanking God for bringing our family to Nashville, to Point of Mercy, for blessing us in so many ways by providing and even by saying no to us at times I remembered where I was 10 short years ago.
I was sad and lonely and thought no one would ever love me the way a girl wants to be loved. I thought that I was destined for loneliness and in those moments, I blamed God. I blamed Him because I wanted Him to fix it my way, not His. I wanted things that He knew would never come to pass and He knew that a better future than I could have ever imagined just awaited me.
So in those moments when I felt alone and forsaken by God, he was smiling because He could see me tonight, crying in thankfulness for every valley that I have walked through because it brought me here. He smiled because He knew there was more in me than I ever thought there could be. He knew a love awaited me that makes my heart still skip a beat after seven years. He knew that I would walk through things that only His presence could mend.
So tonight, as I cried in his presence, I felt such Joy just knowing He loves me enough to save me from my choices and sometimes He loves me enough to let me make the mistakes. He loves me beyond anything I could imagine and that when we walk in His presence, that is where we find true joy.